H.A.L.T.

Last night, I was hot, frustrated, moody and tired all at the same time.  It felt as if the whole world was irritating me! 

The thing is, while we all have moments of moodiness that tend to pass fairly quickly, for me as a compulsive eater, I have to be aware that these mood swings can be a time of trigger into a binge or compulsive relapse. The essential remedy to this is that I remember to H.A.L.T.

This is how my thought processes went:

"I'm hot, this house is too bloody big for me to clean by myself, my back is sore, my hip is sore,  okay I'll do half tonight and finish the rest tomorrow, OMG I've still got another two loads of laundry to hang out, dinner to get, and I want to sit down and read.. when do I ever get to sit down and read??....."

As you can see my 'poor me' was gaining momentum the more I let the thoughts run riot without taking a breath to collect them and reassess. The natural progression from that addictive inducing nonsense was....

"I'm going to pour myself a glass of wine, I deserve it.  Okay I won't have wine but I am hungry and really want to have some chip and dip nibbles before dinner. A few snacks won't do me any harm...oh a big Magnum ice cream right now would go down a treat, make me feel better..." 

Thankfully my recovery radar is on high alert these days due to mindful meditation, recovery work and addiction awareness. What I did instead of binge or eat in a compulsive manner was call a friend.  Stated how I was feeling.  Laughed at myself (in the kindest way). Talked about my mood and the instant reaction to be compulsive over my feelings at that point in time.  

I asked myself was I:

H. ungry ? yes, it was close to dinner time.
A. ngry ? yes, I was irritated because I was sore.
L. onley ? no.
T. ired ? yes, housework in 38 degrees with a sore back and hip is very tiring for me. 


These four states of being need to be checked every time I am feeling compulsive as it is the easiest thing in the world for a food addict to self sabotage over hunger, anger, loneliness and tiredness. We can so easily slip into the poor me's as you read earlier and the one thing Addictive Annie loves is any excuse to air her version of solutions to those feelings i.e NUMB THEM, EAT OVER THEM,  DENY THEM, IGNORE THEM.  

I would just like to say that Addictive Annie is a cunning, baffling and powerful little lady who should never be listened to.  Her voice needs to be halted.  

I did the right thing last night.  I practiced recovery.  It worked.  I did not binge, eat in a compulsive manner or listen to Addictive Annie.  I recognised the true nature of my emotions and was able to pat myself on the back for another successful step on the road to recovery from this disease without a relapse.  

Remember to H.A.L.T. and check your emotions if you ever feel the compulsion to binge.  It will strengthen your recovery so the next time Addictive Annie is whispering nonsense in your ear you can shut her up!

Remember this: